Shower Guests

Dear Grace,
Is it acceptable to invite people to a bridal shower who will not be included in the wedding? My future sister-in-law has two lists and I think they need to be fused.

Dear Sis,
You are correct. If you are invited to shower the expectation is that you are invited to the wedding. Exceptions exist, of course--if it is avery small or destination wedding that most friends/family won't attend,then it is conceivable that a shower invitees might not be on wedding list, but not for a traditional, medium-to-large wedding. It is also possible if the bride-to-be hails from somewhere far from where her wedding will be held that her extended hometown family might throw her a shower without expecting an invite to the big event.

Tell your future s-i-l to merge and cull the lists; it will save hurt feelings and miffed relatives down the road. Weddings are enough of a minefield without asking for trouble. Thanks for writing!

Since we're talking wedding, I'll share Glee's version of this momentous event. Just between us Graces, I have not jumped on the Glee-wagon, but I seem to be in the minority. Since that is the case, enjoy....