Is it acceptable to invite people to a bridal shower who will not be included in the wedding? My future sister-in-law has two lists and I think they need to be fused.
You are correct. If you are invited to shower the expectation is that you are invited to the wedding. Exceptions exist, of course--if it is avery small or destination wedding that most friends/family won't attend,then it is conceivable that a shower invitees might not be on wedding list, but not for a traditional, medium-to-large wedding. It is also possible if the bride-to-be hails from somewhere far from where her wedding will be held that her extended hometown family might throw her a shower without expecting an invite to the big event.
Tell your future s-i-l to merge and cull the lists; it will save hurt feelings and miffed relatives down the road. Weddings are enough of a minefield without asking for trouble. Thanks for writing!
Since we're talking wedding, I'll share Glee's version of this momentous event. Just between us Graces, I have not jumped on the Glee-wagon, but I seem to be in the minority. Since that is the case, enjoy....