Friday, October 01, 2010

Don't Ask....


Dear Grace,
What is the correct response when asked "Have you put on weight?" I have a few ideas, but they would not receive a PG rating.


Grace Says:

What a hideous question. Unless asked by your physician behind closed doors, bound by medical confidentiality and truly related to your health, then it simply should not be asked. But Graces know that. If you are unfortunate enough to be in the presence of someone with conversational skills that permit such an invasive probe, then you have a few possible responses, listed in descending order of Graciousness:

1. Good heavens, I wouldn't dream of boring you with my vital statistics. How is your Pekingese/Pinot Noir/Peach pit collection?
2. I don't discuss medical information with anyone but my doctor.
3. Have you?

I would be tempted to force the offender to listen to the following song for hours on end, but that is definitely out of the bounds of Graciousness.

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